(14) Food for Thought-The Freshman

The clanging of the cafeteria ladies slamming lids onto pots, rings through my ears while the hot oil from the fry basket crackles in the corner. Crowds of tough senior guys push themselves to the front of the line that is forming in front of the counter. The more timid girls and freshmen edge their way behind the mass of starving jocks, but the braver ones push their way into the mess even further. In the cafeteria when the first batch of fries is being handed out, it is every man for himself. You can’t be too polite or generous, unless you want to go through the agony of standing for an hour waiting for the next batch which eats up most of your lunch time anyway so that you might not even be able to eat them once you finally get them. There is definitely a lot on the line when you choose to grab some fries for lunch.

Pastsy and I squeeze past the madness towards the sandwich counter. The caf’s fries beat a roast beef sandwich any day, but they aren’t worth losing an eye over.

“I think I feel like eating fruit salad. Watermelon sounds so refreshing,” Patsy says, picking up a container and inspecting it. I grab one also, and my mouth instantly begins to water at the thought of having some kiwi slices that are piled on the top.

“You’re right.” I smile.

“Hey, how come you have like three pieces of kiwi and I only have one?” She asks as she grabs mine. We’re both giggling as I try and grab it back.

Just then I feel a weight hit my shoulder. Ready to yell at whatever stupid guy was pushed into me, I turn around briskly to find two boys that I have never seen before. They are looking at me, obviously embarrassed and trying not to laugh.

“GEEZ, John, you pushed me into a girl!” I look at the guy who said it and suddenly feel my cheeks feel hot and my heart starts hammering just like when I had first talked to Jeff. His hair is darker, the color of chocolate with caramel highlights, and he’s a little bit taller than I am. What hits me most about him, are his eyes. They are the most amazing eyes I have ever seen-a deep brown with tiny flecks that sparkle when he talks. There is something about them that just captures me and we stand there looking into each other’s eyes for a moment. Then he grabs his fries and walks away with his friends. I realize though, as he continues walking that he’s heading toward the freshmen caf.

Patsy and I both look at each other and start to freak out. “Who is he?” I ask her wide-eyed.

“I don’t know, but he’s GORGEOUS!” We grab our fruit salads, pay for them, and then walk outside to where the rest of our friends are sitting. The sky is a clear blue with a few sparse clouds, and yellow jackets are buzzing around tables like fighter planes, ready to land on teenagers’ Snapples and sandwiches.

Even from the shade where our table is I am hit with the humidity of the afternoon, and pull off my black cardigan so that I am left wearing only a turquoise shirt and khaki shorts. I take off the lid of the fruit salad, but I can’t concentrate on eating at this moment.

“Where’s Jeff?” Patsy asks as she takes a forkful of watermelon and holds it up to her mouth. I am relieved to see that Jeff isn’t sitting at our table even though, at the same time it makes me a little sad.

Ever since the first day of school when we had talked, there has been some sort of awkwardness present which makes me avoid seeing him in the halls, and forces me to be unbelievably quiet when he sits with my friends and me. We had gotten along so well the first day, and then the spark died completely and we both began to pretend our whole introduction never happened.

"He had to go see his English teacher or something." Cameron says through a mouthful of potato chips.

"During lunch?" Charlotte raises her eyebrows as she bites into a bagel. We're all quiet for a moment as everyone eats.

" Are you going to eat that, Heather'?" Sam looks hungrily at the gooey chocolate chip cookie that is already melting onto the wax paper it's wrapped in. Heather looks at it with disgust and gladly passes it to Sam. I roll my eyes at Charlotte. Heather's lunch usually includes a bottle of water and a peanut. She must go home and eat her whole house when no one's looking because no one could survive on that diet.

Heather looks at the cookie for a minute and then begins to talk.

"Oh my gosh you guys, I met the most amazing guy today in my badminton class, but get this, he's a freshmen! What a total waste! That is just against the rules, isn't it? I mean sophomore girls can't go out with freshman!"

"I don't know," Patsy says slyly, "Daria didn't seem to think so when one bumped into her in the cafeteria." This starts the whole table laughing and I laugh weakly along with them. Suddenly I am completely confused with myself. He's younger than I am, completely off limits and what happened to the burning desire to be with Jeff? Yet somehow, I can't help wishing that I could belong to those eyes. That one day I could look into them and tell them everything including, hey hun, how about braving that line and getting me some fries