(26) A Wash in Midterms

“Who can explain exactly what occurred in 1944?" Silence fills the room except for a few coughs and sniffles as my teacher gazes around his students.

"D-Day, very good! Can anyone tell me where D-Day took place?" It is the last period of the day and I have never been more exhausted in my life.

"Normandy, France." Marissa croaks from the corner. I stare at my paper, which is blurred from my bloodshot and watery eyes. It seems like the whole room is just one big doctor's office waiting to happen. The inside of my nose itches and I feel a sneeze coming on. The sensation just hangs there though, even as I look up at the bright ceiling light, which in itself is a myth that has never offered me any aid in letting out sneezes. Walking in a daze up to the tissue box on the table in the front of the room, I walk to the trash can, blow my brains out, and then drop the discarded tissue as I walk back to my seat.

My teacher continues to attempt to review for the midterm in a few days, but my eyes are half closed and all I can think about is the night after my last midterm when I can start retiring before midnight.

The bell rings in the middle of Mr. Andrews spewing out information on the Bay of Pigs Invasion and it can't have echoed throughout the halls any sooner. I walk towards my locker, my eyes focused in front of me, the people passing by me resorted to blurry images. Britney calls out my name while I am turning in my combination, but I can't even make out what she is saying. After the lock clicks and I open the door, I throw all of my textbooks into my bag. When I fill up my bag, I shove books and binders into my open arms.

"Daria! I was calling you!" I see a fuzzy image of blonde hair and a black turtleneck. "Oh my gosh, Dare, you look terrible! You should stay home tomorrow!"

"I don't have a choice." I mumble thinking about the millions of things I have to do and be in class for.

"So many people are sick right now! I'm just glad I started taking Accanesia. Oh my gosh, did I tell you what happened today in Health? I was-"

"I have to go now Brit...I managed to get out. I'll call you tonight and we can talk about it then." I start walking down the hall, knowing full well that I will have absolutely no time tonight left to pick up the phone and just chat.

I reach the jeep with Olivia waiting impatiently in it, and throwing my bag in the back, I sink into the passenger seat, close my eyes, and take the opportunity to snatch a couple of minutes of sleep.

I open my eyes slowly as I feel the car stop and Olivia slams her door shut. My eyes still closed, I clutch the side door and fall out of the car, slink my bag on my back and head into the house. Reaching the kitchen, my stomach aches for fulfillment and hungrily I start eating the crusted over macaroni and cheese left in the pot from mine and Olivia's dinner last night. It's cold and rubbery but I am too tired and stressed out to care.

"Daria. How was your Chemistry test today?" I hear my mother ask me pleasantly. I stare down at the macaroni and scrape the fork along the side of it. "That good?" My mother says gently. "What happened?"

My head aches, my eyes itch and water, I feel like I am going to fall over, and my throat is parched. Suddenly it all comes out in one giagantic rolling of tears, exasperated sentences, and a powerful sneeze.

"I failed it....because I couldn't study last night because I was up until midnight studying for my geometry test, finishing my Spanish packet, putting finishing touches on my English presentation, and attempting to start studying for the two midterms I have this week in my worst classes! Today I had no calculator for the geometry test, I lost my Spanish packet, my English presentation was a joke, and I didn't have lunch today because I was making up a test for World Studies. Tonight I have to finish an English paper, write a report on Africa, not to mention type up an article for journalism. I feel like I am going to die but can't take a day to stay home and get better, I am failing my clases...and all the lights are blown in my bed room. Everything is going wrong!" I sob.

"You're just worn out and sick on top of everything else." My mother tells me. "Just do what you can tonight but most importantly get some rest so that you will be able to handle it all tomorrow." More tears splash into the pot as I stab the remaining noodles with my fork.

I throw the pot angrily into the sink and drag my bag upstairs to my room. I should pull out my Chemistry book and start studying electrons, neutrons, and atoms but all I can do is crash onto my bed and stare up at the ceiling. My eyes beg me to let them close and take me to the world of deep slumber, but I hold them open, knowing that if I give in I’ll never wake up. Midterms have once again crept up more mysteriously than ever.

I laugh insanely inside at myself for being so stupid to procrastinate such a large part of my year. I remembered how determined I had been before Christmas vacation to devote atleast one day to doing nothing but studying each particular subject. I had written down “study for midterms” every day in my list of things to do, but some how each time it was crossed off and forgotten. Things kept popping up that demanded my attention and left no room for studying for tests weeks away. Even this weekend I had had no possible time to start my studying. I feel like I am at the end of my rope, a slave to my schedule, and locked up in a world of textbooks, vocabulary words, essay assignments, and grades. I have no time to check my email, neaten up my room, spend time with my family, or even put light bulbs into the sockets of my ceiling lamp. My world has come crashing down all because of five lousy tests.

Suddenly I look over to the open magazine lying on the floor in the corner of my room. Britney Spears gleams back at me with her perfect whitened teeth, high cheekbones, and shiny blonde hair. At the top of the page it reads, “Does this look like a girl who spends her nights at home washing her hair?” A big “YES!” is scrawled under it next to a large bottle of Herbal Essence shampoo.

As I run through everything I have to do for school in my mind, all I can think about is how refreshing a long hot shower would be. Sure, I had taken one several hours ago this morning, but I desire to just enjoy the feeling of just standing there while figuring out my all my problems. The soothing, hot water calls my name, along with the gentle feel of a body puff and rich smells of scented shampoo and soap. I look down at the pile of books, review packets, and index cards. It is all ready four-o’clock and as I calculate the approximate amount of time I have to devote to each subject and assignment, I end up with my new bed time being twelve forty-five if I take time out to wash my hair. I sigh, being torn between meeting the expectations of school and being able to relax and calm myself down with the perfumes of chamomile and passion flower. Midterms are definitely more important, but maybe just half an hour of relaxation and focus will help me with my exams more than just another half hour of studying.

I make my decision and take control. Throwing the textbooks onto the floor, I grab a towel and head for the bathroom. I realize that a large part of life is about scholastic achievement and meeting others’ expectations but another large part is taking care of yourself and meeting your own expectations. I realize that maybe one of the best ways to relieve stress from other situations is to just calm your self down by taking time out just for yourself. Since my life is basically a soap opera right now, the shower seems the logical place to start sorting it out.