(29) Wasted Relationships

“Hey go back, that’s a good show!”Britney whines as she sits her can of Coke on my coffee table. I glance over at Charlotte, sprawled on the couch, who continues to click through a dozen channels, ignoring every one’s requests for their choices of entertainment. I close my eyes with a sigh and enjoy the taste of crust, hot tomato sauce, and
tender globs of cheese in my mouth. It’s definitely one of those random Saturday nights where you’ve ended up hanging with your best friends, but you all are too lazy to go out and actually plan something, so you resort to watching pointless sitcoms and stuffing your face with as much pizza as you can manage all night.

“There’s obviously nothing on, you guys. Why don’t we play a game or something?” Charissa grabs this month’s Town and Country and starts flipping through its pages. Charlotte clicks off the television at her response.

“Charissa, it’s not like we’re in second grade. Yeah,let’s all go play a happy game of Candy Land and Mall Madness!”I instantly remember after Charlotte’s remark the known fact that when my friends and I get bored, we start to pick on each other.

“I was merely making a suggestion.”Charissa sighs and tosses the magazine back onto the table.

“Why don’t we just rent a movie?”Patsy adds from where she is sitting cross legged and making tiny braids in her long, blonde tresses.

“There’s no one to drive us.”I reply, coveting more than ever my driver’s license.

“True.”

We sit looking at each other in silence, brooding over the fact that none of us have any brilliant ideas of what to do and not being able to drive even if we did. Charlotte clicks back on the TV again. We all go back to staring at the screen.

“How was the party?”I ask, not looking away from Nick Lackey pelting a football at an arrangement of targets with TRL video titles.

“Fine.”Britney replies with little enthusiasm.

“Come on, Brit, you thought it was more than fine.”Patsy laughs. “We saw you and Jason together in the basement! That sucks that you had to baby-sit, Daria, you should have seen how Brit was all over
Jason Lewis! It was hysterical!”

We all turn around at once with renewed interest and Charlotte quickly turns off the TV, not turning her gaze from Britney’s crimson face.

“You guys, it was nothing.”Britney laughs uneasily, running her hand across the white carpet. I was totally wasted. I don’t even really remember that whole thing anyways. Besides, Jason definitely knows that if I hadn’t downed four beers, I would have never even looked at him.”My friends laugh, but I listen sadly. “Anyways, do u really want to hear a tragic story?”As soon as Britney realizes she has everyone’s attention, she continues. “It turns out that
Heather finally got together with Jeremy that same night!”

“The Jeremy? Jeremy Woods, the senior she’s been obsessed with since October?” Charissa lays down on the carpet, her chin resting in her hands.

“Yep.”Britney waits for a response, then keeps going. ”The problem is, she doesn’t remember anything about it. I was talking on the phone this afternoon to a girl in my Chemistry class and it turns out she heard a couple of girls telling some things to Heather at the
Sugarbowl this morning that I don’t think she was very comfortable with.”

“Oh my gosh,”Charissa says quietly. “I saw them together, but then they disappeared for like forty-five minutes.”

“Well, anyways, it turns out Heather is trying to play it cool and is telling everyone that she and Jeremy are together now. But the problem is when I talked to Jeremy’s friend Andrew a couple of hours ago, he told me a different story. Supposedly he was telling a group of guys about some sophomore he had gotten with at the party who was so plastered that she basically fell on top of him! And when Andrew asked him if he was now going out with Heather, he just laughed and informed him that he all ready had a girlfriend from New Canaan! She totally bagged her chance of that relationship!” Britney starts laughing, but I am getting annoyed by Britney’s rising authority in the latest gossip of our grade.

“I feel bad for Heather. She’s going to lose so much respect because of this.”Charissa looks down at the floor

“Oh, whatever. She totally had it coming anyways. Maybe she’ll be more careful now.”

“You shouldn’t talk Britney.”Patsy murmured. You should be praying that Jason doesn’t tell anyone of your little night together or your reputation will be gone as well.

“No. Jason doesn’t have the guts to do that. Anyways, this thing happens all the time, it will happen to you too, Patsy if it
didn’t all ready. I thought it was interesting that you sat next to Alex all night on the couch. Do you even remember how many beers you drank?” My friends started laughing and Patsy giggled as well.

“I saw this other guy and girl too! You’ll never guess who they were, you would never put them together!” Charlotte starts. I
have had enough though.

“I’m going outside for some air you guys,” I said. Even though it is below freezing outside I saunter out through the game rooms sliders onto the pool deck and sit on the edge of the dark empty hole as I stare into the void. I’m no priss, but I believe that there is more to the physical side of relationships than meaningless hookups. I think to
myself, of my parents relationship--neither one had really had any practical experience, if you know I mean, until they met in college and despite ups and downs in the market and their marriage there was a solidity, a trust. I want that. I hug myself tightly for warmth and continue to think about what my friends had just discussed. I want that more than I want the momentary thrill of some senior’s lusty attention. How do I stand by and watch my friends risk their virtue on a bottle of lite and a selfish moment of biological materialism? Where do I draw the lines? How do I avoid these wasted relationships?